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Isn't it funny how simply starting a paper can be the hardest part of the writing process?
Sure, I still stumble over many other parts, but I feel so much more confident afterward. I’m always amazed by this whenever I start a new paper.
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Dear Marie Antoinette,
I’d rather not write a term paper about you.
Goodbye.
I = jealous
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I hate waiting for mail.
And it sucks, because last week I was staying late after school for the play. And then when I got home, I got all excited, because I thought the letter would be home. And it wasn’t there.
This lovely anxiousness will continue to this week. Which is going to be a total mess. I will be:
- On my period
- Staying late at school for the play the whole week
- Turning in a paper that is 15% of my grade. And I haven’t started it yet.
- Doing my egg drop project for physics. Even though it’s not even that many points, and I have the parachute and everything done, and just have to do the report, chances are I’m going to be flipping out.
- WAITING FOR THE FUCKING MAIL.
Writing this down makes me think that this will all be a peice of cake, even though I know I’m a ticking PMS-chocolate-eating-cramp-having-crying-bitch bomb.
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(937): You went to church with your boobs hanging out?
(978): Theyr’e a gift from god, I figured I should show him i’m using them well.
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I think I may of just became a cat person.
Her name is Jade. She’s a tortishell colored kitten. She has snuggled with me and both of my parents - and it’s her first day home. She’s two months old, meaning she was born when Max died. Sign, much?
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I am consistantly disgusted by my thoughts. Hopefully no one can read minds. It’s just odd what pops into your head, what it creates. I wonder how I draw certain conclusions, why I think some things mean little, and others mean so much. I wish there was a way to map my brain - and not just “frontal lobe” mapping. As in, “your brain reacts this way to this action.”
I really wish I was a character in a book sometime. Because the author can tell you who that person is, and how they think. I wish there was a sorting hat of some kind in real life, so you could identify who you really are, and why you do things, and what you should do. It’s too hard to figure out what’s good for you.
Or maybe I need to do some soul searching?
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What do you do when you realize you’ve thought you wanted what was to be special, to do something different, and then realize what you’ve wanted is what everyone else wants - or what society tells you to want.
How do you figure out if what you “want” is actually what you want, or what’s just expected of you?
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Thought just occured to me:
I’m having a hard time this year keeping in touch with my best friend Kalle. I miss her bunches.
If we’re having a hard time this year, what’s going to happen next year?
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I’m getting a cat this week!
I’m super excited, because it’s been terrible living without a pet.
But at the same time, I’m nervous. I’m a dog person. And I still really miss my dog. The reason why we’re getting a cat is because my dad says he can’t take loosing another dog. What if I don’t like this cat? What if he eats our christmas tree?
Just realized that this year when we watch National Lampoon’s Christmas vacation, instead of laughing when the cat gets shocked to death, I should be horrified.
I don’t know how I feel about that.
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I really should do some of my math homework. But I don’t want to. I’m just tired, even though I didn’t do anything at school or practice. Sometimes I feel like it’s exhausting just to breathe.
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